The Trying Game - Bye Bye Baby

I can’t tell you why, but in my 20’s I started to get an inkling that babies weren't going to come easy to me. Maybe it was because I was studying Tradition Chinese Medicine, and had begun to realise I had quite a few syndromes going on! There was also the fact that we hadn't exactly been careful when I first met my soon to be husband, and yet nothing had ever happened.

When we got married, we were in the middle of building our house, in the good old days of the boom. We were living above a local pub, finding married life quite stressful.  The transition from engaged to married didn't seem to be as smooth as others. Perhaps we were both trying to hold on to our independence.

Living above a pub wasn't the healthiest environment to be in, I am a diabolical drinker, 2 glasses of wine is my limit, but I was smoking at the time. My new husband enjoyed the Guinness on tap downstairs! I got pregnant 5 months after we got married, and I was delighted, gave up smoking, and took the pregnancy very seriously, but looking back, I wasn't ready to be a mother, as a couple we had a lot of sorting out to do. My life revolved around my work, work and more work. An incredibly un-stressful job, but a very hard one, energy wise, I remember looking back at the diary the day I lost that baby, and I had 8 sports massages in, what the hell was I playing at?

So from that moment, lots of things changed, the joy of getting pregnant personally for me was lost forever. A miscarriage takes away all your joy, it strips it from your heart. Before you have a miscarriage, you begin to love a treasure, this little person growing inside you. We even had a name, I was certain it was a boy. But when you realise that actually you are at the hands of fate. Every pregnancy after that moment can be terrifying, and joyless.

I remember I was waiting for the D&C, it was the day before Christmas Eve, and for some reason I was left waiting in the store cupboard, by the operating theatre, in my gown and manky boots. I was crying until a lovely doctor came in horrified that they’d left me wait in there. Put in the theatre, the nurses were discussing how many miscarriages they had had that week, then what they were hoping to get for Christmas.

I think something in my brain after this decided that I never wanted to go through that experience ever again, so we didn't conceive for 3 years after that. Looking back I don’t like regretting moments in my life, but those 3 years I really wish I hadn't put my life on hold, I wish we had gone on more holidays and had more fun, I wish I had stopped thinking I was pregnant every bloody month.

I got pregnant again, finally, but I didn't feel it was quite right. I think as women we have incredibly strong intuition, if we choose to listen to it. My sister was working with me, we were having a great time, I remember we were going to go to Kildare Shopping Village to go Christmas shopping, I had had a dream I wasn't pregnant any more, and that morning I started bleeding. Turned out my dream was right, the scan showed an empty sac. I was remarkably calm, after this, until my dad rang me, and I will never forget the sadness in his voice as he cried on the phone for what his baby of our family, had lost. I balled after that.

Life moved on as it does, oddly I grew stronger as a person and a therapist. I had empathy and a deeper understanding when treating fertility. I played polocrosse, got help with work, gave up the physical therapy part of my work. My sister was due her baby at the end of that summer, and asked me to be her birthing partner, in the UK. I was so excited and distracted. I had started to go for counselling with a wonderful woman, and as a couple we were incredibly strong. I conceived that month. I will never forget it, it was the only month in all those years I took my eye off the ball!!! I was sat in the hospital watching my sister in labour on my 3^rd really strong coffee, thinking god this tastes rotten...bingo!

We have two gorgeous children, Josh and Heather; Heather came as a surprise 18 months after Josh. I have gone on a journey that millions of women have gone before me. We are pretty amazing really. I meet women that blow me away, with their courage and strength every day.

My Fertile Body Pregnancy Support is a 6-8 week support programme to help couples during those fragile weeks of early pregnancy. It’s going to be available in the early months of 2016. And I hope we reach out and help as many people as possible.

Katie Murphy Lic Ac TCMCI

Our 8 week Create A Bump Programme due soon!

 

After 5 years creating this programme and 25 combined years getting amazing results in the fertility field, My Fertile Body is born. What is this amazing programme? We are two Acupuncturists, based in Ireland. Both Lucy and I Katie noticed that we started to get incredible success rates helping couples to conceive, when we started to listen to the body, mind and soul of each patient.

When a couple decide on some level that they want to have a baby, the early stages of “trying” are fun, almost naughty, and incredibly exciting. But after a few months and no sign of a positive pregnancy test, fear starts to creep in. Fear along with its friends worry, and doubt. Then things aren’t so much fun, sex becomes a chore, an almost desperate experience for some. Men find they are put under enormous pressure to perform, here, now, the ovulation kit says so!

We see this pattern 80% of the time, the relationship can become strained and from the moment that the woman wants a baby so badly, that she will do anything to get it, well that’s not a healthy place to be. Our bodies release stress hormones, our sleep patterns become erratic and our fertile bodies start to let us down.

My fertile body 8 week programme is unique; it takes into consideration every point of pain a couple can go through to conceive. We address all aspects of getting the body, mind and soul ready to conceive and carry a beautiful, healthy baby into this world.

Think of your garden for a moment, to plant a vibrant flower, how would you prepare the soil? You would use the richest, most fertile soil, full of nutrients, watered and warm, ready for that flower to grow in this wonderful, nurtured environment. Our bodies are just the same.

Our system works in 8 weeks, once a week a live webinar, where we guide you through a pretty mind blowing system, to relax your mind, through meditation, and self- discovery, to give your body the best chance of conception, and so by the end of the 8 weeks, your body, if not pregnant, will be changed for the better, your mind will be focused on all the positive aspects of having a baby, and your relationship will be supported. The self-acupressure classes will give you the ability to really see changes in your menstrual cycle; we will give you so much clear guidance to get pregnant, and most importantly your body will be singing with energy, so your pregnancy will be utterly amazing!

My Fertile Body Create A Bump 8 week programme includes;

·         Webinars; Detoxify your body, addictions, supplements, knowing your menstrual cycle, foods to optimize fertility, acupressure points, abdominal massage techniques, changing your mind set, dealing with stress, male fertility boosts, miscarriage, ART (assisted reproduction) support.

·         Guest speakers including a Gynaecologist, answering any western medical issues.

·         A private Facebook group, with daily support from our fertility experts.

·         Emails and weekly questions and answers

And so much more join us on this incredible journey, make that first positive step forwards, and you will never look back…



Lucy Townsley Lic AC & Katie Murphy Lic AC